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In the south there is a saying that you are
not a man until you Daddy tells you "You're a man". This of course is
a reference to the affirmation of your manhood or womanhood by your father. It
is his testimony that he has trained you and that he has confidence in you.
Conformation and affirmation is the concrete that forms the foundation of ones
life. A father knows his offspring better than most and will know when they are
ready to go out and make their mark on the world. For some this may come at a
fairly early age, for others it may not come until much latter. At any rate
there comes a times in everyone's life when their fathers should say by word or
action "You're ready -Go get 'em".
Affirmation is a wonderful
thing. Lack of affirmation is a dreadful and destructive thing. Affirmation
gives a person a feeling of worth, self-confidence and determination. It is a
leaning post for the times when the winds of adversity are blowing squarely in
our face. It is an invisible security blanket during times of hardship and
uncertainty. It is absolutely essential for successful living and well being.
Parents who affirm their children give them a gift that is beyond comprehension,
a gift more valuable than gold. In fact it is a gift that enables them to be
able to mine their own gold.
Any observant person can readily detect
those people who have been affirmed by their parents from those who haven't.
Those who have are confidant, often outspoken and have a firm, steady
foundation and belief system. They believe in themselves and if they are
Christians they believe strongly and expect to serve as well as receive from
their God.
Those who haven't been affirmed take one of
two different courses during their life. One expression of this lack of
affirmation is a belligerent, argumentative, attitude. People in this category
are usually loud and are consistently trying to prove their worth. They will
often take great pains to tell how good they are at something or how
intelligent they are or how much other people depend on them and value their
opinions. They appear to be full of pride but actually are full of doubt. Their
attitude comes not so much from having a prideful spirit but from a form of the
Anti-Christ Spirit. These people make good radicals and are always looking for
some way to right the system, the church or whatever they deem to have caused
them to be consigned to failure. Intolerance for those unlike themselves is a
hallmark of this type personality.
These folks are often found in
organizations like the KKK or Nazi party or Black Panthers or Black Muslim
groups. Trying to find identity in downgrading others so they can upgrade
themselves in someone's mind and find a place somewhere other than the bottom
of the pecking order.
The other side of the pendulum swing is
those who are unsure of themselves and their calling. They will not readily
express their opinion or do anything that might bring any attention to themselves.
They can become contentious if pressed to open up but usually are timid. The
worst cases are those who feel that they don't even have a right to be here. If
they are walking down a sidewalk they feel that it is someone else's sidewalk
and will readily move completely off of it to let another pass. It is after all
not his or her sidewalk; it belongs to everyone else.
People often mistake this attitude for a
meek and humble spirit when it is actually a form of an anti-Christ spirit. Not
that the people afflicted with this malady are anti-Christ but they are the
victims of and are deceived by this spirit. They have been convinced that they
are worthless and of no value. This spirit will often attach itself to some one
in early childhood if it sees the possibility that they are not going to be
affirmed by their parents. It can become somewhat of a generational curse.
Passed down from one unhappy parent to another.
We often see this spirit manifested in the
church as an unhappy person who never feels a part of the church because they
think neither the pastor nor his flock like them. They are the ones who do most
of the complaining, are against everything and will not participate at all.
Most are consistently looking for conformation from the Pastor or leadership
that they are valued.
A Pastor who has this problem will look for
affirmation of his worth as a person and as a pastor from his members. He will
feel either that he is not worthy and will not have the ability or stamina to
lead them to green pastures or he will be a hard Shepherd quarreling with the
sheep and never satisfied with any accomplishment they may make. Either way it
hurts a church and ultimately the kingdom of God and definitely hurts the
persons affected with this malady.
Affirmation by our parents is of extreme
importance to our success as individuals. Equally as important is for us to
affirm our children. It is a continual process throughout their childhood. It
is probably the single most valuable asset that we can pass on to them. It may
be the most important thing one person can do for another.
Lack of affirmation of someone as a person
of value and worth is possibly the longest lasting and most destructive thing
one person can do to another.
Most
of the parents who don't affirm their children don't realize that they are not
doing so and are probably themselves victims of the same treatment. Parents are
not the only folks that affirm or disaffirm someone. We all do it every day
with our friends, acquaintances and family. We also do it with other members of
society. One of Satan's best methods of disaffirming people is through racism.
How does racism have anything to do with
lack of affirmation? Racism itself is a hidden form of the Anti-Christ spirit
that is contained in lack of affirmation. By discriminating against a person
for whatever reason we are saying to them "You are not of sufficient value
to be associated with me". It looses this Anti-Christ spirit that is no
respecter of any group of people. It hates humans of any sort and will attack
those who perpetrate this act on others just a surely as it does on those who
are the target. Racism is like a suicide bomber, the bomber is affected just a
badly as those he sought to hurt. Racism hurts and affects everyone.
This
spirit that tells people "Your are of little or no worth" is often
unfortunately transferred to the rest of the family and community. This feeling
of worthlessness is then manifested in either violent reaction to society or
violent regression and a feeling of uselessness.
In our own country we have seen in the two
people groups that have been discriminated against the most, Native Americans
and African Americans, these two personalities come forth. It has been over a
century since the Native Americans were removed from their lands. None of us
today had any part of this event nor can we remember it. We cannot know the
anguish they must have felt.
One
thing is certain; the racism that led to this tragedy is still affecting many
Native Americans today in the form of a futile outlook on life.
Many of the Native Americans faced the
hopelessness of reservation life by just sitting on the reservation, leading
uneventful and unfruitful lives or became alcoholics and were of little value
to themselves or anyone else. That unfortunate legacy has been passed down in
far too many cases. Lack of affirmation and respect for this people group has
denied the world of many unknown benefits that should have come forth from
among them.
Many in the second group, the
African-Americans, followed suit by either becoming anti-social and fighting
established authority or joined radical groups such as the Communist party or
Islamic religions. The other extreme became the downcast poverty ridden type
who felt that everything belonged to everyone but them and would not even walk
on someone else's sidewalk for fear of trespassing. This is not a natural state
for any human being. It is the work of an evil spirit who diligently works
against people coming forth in what God has ordained for them, both as
individuals and as a people group. It has worked well for Satan when he has
been able to convince them that they are something less than a valid man or a
woman.
John
said that the spirit of Anti-Christ was loose in the world in New Testament
times and it is still loose and rampant today. In fact it is probably in
epidemic proportions today.
An anti-Christ spirit can be defined as
any spirit that seeks to oppose Christ in any way. It will seek to oppose him
at every opportunity. It opposes His teachings, His word, His kingdom, as well
as the progression of any person toward maturity in Christ. It will seek to do
what its' master seeks, to steal, kill and destroy. His main purpose is to
cause discord and discomfort among people and to maintain in them a low level
of self-esteem thereby producing a low level of productive activity. He seeks
to emphasize failure and cause people to expect failures instead of expecting
good results. He seeks to nullify Gods promises of fulfillment in ones calling
or vocation. He seeks to dispense hatred and mistrust of anyone different from
ourselves and to cause despondency in all people everywhere. In other words his
purpose is to keep the good things of God from coming forth in every ones life.
What better way to accomplish this than to cause feelings of worthlessness or
lack of self worth or an inferiority complex or create a belligerent hateful
know it all attitude in people? How better to do this than to start at an early
age to cause a lack of affirmation of ones worth. How better than to start at
an early age the ills of racism? How better than to instill in a religious
group the belief that they are to force the entire world to submit to a heathen
god? This Anti-Christ spirit is loose in the world today and was from the
earliest of times even since the fall of man. It started with Cain and his
feeling of resentment of his brother because he didn't think he could measure
up to him. God warned him that if he didn't change his attitude that sin indeed
was waiting on him at his door and would devour him. Devour him it did. It
still is devouring people today, even entire nations.
This same Anti-Christ Spirit affects many
in the Islamic countries who are by nature of their religion racist and
separatist. The faithful believers feel that no other people other than those
of the Islamic faith are of value unless they convert to their faith. This
attitude releases that same Anti-Christ spirit that reverts back on those who
perpetrated it in the first place. It is like a snake that bites the hand that
feeds it. They themselves become "Unconfirmed" because of their lack
of acceptance by the rest of the world, other religious groups and by their
unwillingness to come into the modern world. Their feelings of lack of value
and worth are used by Satan to promote radical beliefs that they can become of
great value if they kill or are killed in service to their god Allah. This is
easily the most discernible form of the anti-Christ spirit and is usually the
most violent form.
How can we fight this spirit? First we can
seek to affirm anyone we know as being a person of value and worth. A little
human kindness and respect will go a long way. Parents aren't the only ones who
can affirm or disaffirm someone. We can make sure that we don't intentionally
give any place to racist attitudes or look down on any person for any reason.
We must realize that God loves us all, even those different than us.
What should we do if we are one of those
who were never affirmed by our parents or teachers or pastors? We can and
should seek God for His affirmation. He will affirm you and strengthen you. His
is the affirmation that counts the most anyway. Our affirmation and sense of
self worth should come from the loving Heavenly Father through the ministry of
the Holy Spirit which was made possible by our adoption into His family by
Jesus Christ. Seek Him and His affirmation and all others will not be
important. In His affirmation we can go forward and do the things we should with
confidence whether or not we are known or appreciated by men.
This confidence that God loved and valued
him is what gave Daniel the stability that served him so well. He could move
mightily in a hostile environment because he knew his Heavenly Father affirmed
him. An angel even told him so in the ninth Chapter of Daniel and again in the
tenth chapter saying,"Oh man greatly beloved."
We to can say that about ourselves. No
matter who we are we can know that we are beloved of God and that He supports
us in what we do and loves us even when we fail. He will guide and direct us in
our ways. We must always be aware lest we get into a works mentality trying to
prove ourselves to God. We don't have to prove ourselves to Him. He loved us
even when we were sinners, how much more will He seek to affirm us after we are
saved and brought into His family?
Let's begin to affirm each other. Let's
give everyone the respect they are due as Gods children. Their father doesn't
have to tell them they are a man or a woman for it to be so, we can tell them.
God THE FATHER affirms them.
The sooner we learn to recognize these
satanic spirits and discern their activity in our lives and society the sooner
we will begin to know how to pray and how to act in order to defeat these evil
forces. The gates of hell will not prevail; the church of Jesus Christ will
prevail.
Ray
Cleghorn